Month: May 2015

This Kid

“Mom,” Josiah said after spending hours completing scholarship applications and emailing forms to the administration office, “can you come Josiah by graffitiread over this?” He hasn’t even officially graduated from high school yet, and I already know that college is stressful. Finding the right one, filling out all the paperwork, applying for scholarships. It is serious business.

“What is this?” I asked as I sat down at his computer.

“It’s called Roomsync, and it’s supposed to help people find roommates.”

Here is what he wrote:

ABOUT ME:  I am a drummer, but I know how to keep quiet and not annoy people with it. I tend to have lots of friends, but I don’t usually hang out with them. I’m from Des Moines, Iowa and, therefore, I know a lot about corn. I can’t juggle or do a backflip, but I can do at least 1 pull-up on any given day. I have a good sense of humor and am fluent in sarcasm. I’m pretty smart, but I’m friends with geniuses and dummies alike. I’m a strong Christian and am very excited to attend Cedarville. After I wrote this I went back to make sure I capitalized and punctuated everything correctly. After that I had my mommy double check it.

WHAT I WANT IN A ROOMMATE:  Ideally my perfect roommate would be Morgan Freeman, but I doubt he has any plans to go to college at this point.

I’ve got to admit, I’m pretty excited to meet whoever ends up being his roommate.

Lethal Toiletries

gun box of toiletries“Hey,” I told Mike when he called after leaving town for the weekend, “you forgot your toiletries.”

“I did?” he asked. “Did you see them there?”

“No,” I said, tip-toeing through the land mine of nail polish to take the chick flick out of the DVD player and insert a second one. “I just saw the toiletry bag on the bedroom floor. You probably just dropped it on the way to the car.”

“Oh, actually, I looked for the bag and couldn’t find it, so I just packed my toiletries in a gun box instead.”

Sometimes I just don’t know where to start.