Month: March 2015

Too Faithful Grandpa

“Sharla,” Grandma said as I squeezed through her doorway and heaved the collection of bulging grocery bags onto her grandma and grandpa counter, “I’m glad you’re here. Your grandfather doesn’t recognize me and keeps telling me that I’m not his wife.”

“Oh no,” I said, rubbing the red semi-circles that indented my arms where the plastic bags had dug into my skin. “That is so sad.”

“Sharla!” Grandpa said as he walked into the living room. “Well! What a surprise.”

“I brought all the groceries you requested,” I told him.

“Well, I just can’t believe this!” He smiled and hugged me. “You showing up like this in the middle of the day!”

“I know,” I rolled with it, even though two o’clock was my usual time to stop by their apartment.

“I was just telling Sharla what has been going on here,” Grandma told Grandpa. “I explained how you think that I’m not your wife.”

“What?” Grandpa asked, adjusting his hearing aids.

Repeating only the last part of her prior sentence, and greatly adding to the confusion, Grandma shouted, “I’m not your wife.”

“That’s right,” Grandpa nodded.

“Grandma,” I whispered as I pulled her aside, “sometimes it’s probably better to just play along with whatever he says. I know it has to be hard and scary when he doesn’t recognize you, but it will only aggravate him if we try to correct him.”

“Well I know that, Sharla,” she rolled her eyes. “But, since he thinks I’m not his wife, he won’t let me into the bedroom, and I have to go through the bedroom to get to the bathroom. I can’t hold it much longer.”

She raises a valid point.

 

 

Five Hours

“Drake!” I yelled, after returning home later than anticipated, rushing through the garage, and into Drake’s room, “I shaggy hair drakeneed you to pack all the stuff you want to take to North Carolina before you leave for your orchestra concert tonight. I’m still cleaning out the hot tub, then I have to pack, empty the perishable food from the refrigerator, and take Grandma and Grandpa’s groceries to them. Dad will load the car as soon as he gets home and we will leave directly after your concert.”

“Well,” he said hesitantly, “I just carried all my laundry downstairs because it needs washed and I can’t pack until that’s done.”

I’m not sure how it happened, but there was a lot of action and high-pitched sounds, narrowed vision, and, eventually, Drake was on his back on his bed with my head on his chest sobbing something about never leaving on time and did he think I was magical.

“It should be fine,” he reassured me. “We aren’t leaving for five hours.”

Which explains why he took dirty clothes on vacation AND cleaned the hot tub.

 

More Laughing

boys formal
Drake and Josiah Hintz

“Did you enjoy the winter formal last night?” I asked my two sons at breakfast since they had returned way after I stopped being awake the night before.

“It was great,” Josiah said.

“It was fun,” Drake agreed. “Josiah ended up stealing my date, so Reid and I shared his date because sharing is caring.”

“Who did Reid go with?”

“Jonathan.”

“Wait, Reid went with Jonathan instead of a girl?”

“Yeah. And then we all just hung out together.”

“So, neither of you went with a girl?”

“Well, I mean, if we had girlfriends we would want to go with them, but, since we don’t, we’d rather just hang out as a group of guys. That way there is less make-up and less talking and more laughing.”

“He’s not wrong,” Josiah nodded.

They may live with me forever.